Dan's Blog Episode 3: The Lady in the Pink Scarf

First a gentle reminder. If you experience any of the following:
Easily hurt and/or compromised feelings
Extreme religious and/or political opinions and mentality
Diarrhea of the mouth while suffering the above afflictions
Please do not read my blog.

If you have an aversion to cursing, violence, sex, destruction of property, having a sense of humor, or Article 19 of The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, please do not read my blog.

If you dislike or have difficulty understanding satire/sarcasm, just don't even bother. Nobody likes you anyway.

Awesome blog reading discretion has been advised. Don't be mad, Boo.



Friday, August 03, 2007

The Lady in the Pink Scarf

So, a few days ago, Marie and I are driving as someone on a motorcycle passes us. Harley Davidson Fat Boy with a wind shield and a 'bitch bar'.

Anyone who has spoken at any length with me knows my great dislike for their kind. 'Bikers' piss me off.


Not to say there aren't good people that ride motorcycles. It just so happens that nearly every 'man' that I've met that 'rides' is a self-centered, egomaniacal douche nozzle. They are more interested in the way their 'bike' looks and sounds than they are about their own jobs, relationships, or anything else that isn't directly related to their 'hog'.

Asked a guy one time why he does it. He responded, "If you have to ask you will never understand"....yeah...I guess you could say the same thing about having great sex, or riding a roller coaster, or eating a fucking twinkie, but hey, this is the 'biker' motto. So that's way cool or something.

Knew another guy that was showing his buddies how loud his exaust pipes were....at a little league game! So you have a bunch of five year olds standing around holding their ears just so some jack ass can let you hear the sound of how small his dick is.

But, I digress.

As this person passed us on the motorcycle, I see very clearly a wrinkled face of a person in their 60's at least with coke bottle glasses.
This was too cool for words.
Now, knowing nothing but male 'bikers' I automatically assumed this was a guy. Marie pointed out the pink scarf and told me it was a lady...
Then there were a dozen thoughts of this woman, who enjoys a hobby dominated by 'men' and has probably smacked down her fair share of 'biker' assholes (as I know how 'bikers' are when you get a few of them together). I have met a few regular folks who happen to enjoy the hobby of motocycles; take a hint douches of the 'biker' community (they actually call it a community), you don't have to dress the part all the damn time....you actually aren't that cool.

My hat is off to this woman. Listening to 'bikers' speak works my nerves. Watching them swagger as they walk and hearing some gullible person coo about how hot a 'biker' looks as they do this makes me sick. Picking gravel from a 'biking' accident victim's skin as he swears that it was his girlfriend's fault that they crashed works my nerves. I honestly believe that this woman would raise a single eyebrow at all these egotistical behaviors and instead of telling me how 'tricked out' her 'ride' is would proceed to tell me how her grandson hit a stand-up double at his little league game....to which she drove her Buick La Sabre.
I really wish she could read these words, but I don't think she'd care one way or the other. Because, let's face it, she's probably too cool and too busy living life to bother with a myspace page anyway.